quote: insults

  • If you were my husband, I’d poison your tea! – Lady Astor If I were your husband, I’d drink it! – Winston Churchill

  • I refuse to get involved in a battle of wits with an unarmed person. – Unknown

  • Support bacteria – they’re the only culture some people have. – Unknown

  • I’ve been trying to see things from your point of view, but I can’t seem to get my head that far up my arse. – Unknown

  • Robert Redford used to be such a handsome man and now look at him: everything has dropped, expanded and turned a funny colour. – George Best

  • I never forget a face, but in your case I’ll be glad to make an exception. – Groucho Marx

  • Sir, you are drunk! – Lady Astor Yes, madam, I am drunk. But in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. – Winston Churchill

  • He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary. – William Faulkner Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words? – Ernest Hemingway

  • He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know. – Abraham Lincoln

  • I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it. – Groucho Marx

  • I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend… if you have one. – George Bernard Shaw Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second… if there is one. – Winston Churchill

  • I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here. – Stephen Bishop